What do we take. What do we lock away. What do we leave out. Which books must accompany me. Which can be stored now. Which need to remain at my fingertips. What about art supplies. What if we stay in England. What if we return. What if the house sells soon. What if it doesn't.
Objects and their needs. I walk, run, turn, away.
Hide in a good book.
Sigh, return.
•
read: finished great housetaste: low-carb, after over-indulgence
see: swallows in their sky-dance
hear: a woodland awakening that heralds warmer weather
smell: tea brewing
think: that we can hold a memory of things untouched
feel: had less than 4hrs sleep, take a guess
when are you moving? I have two months to go, and will initially only have what fits into my 20 kg luggage allowance with me. for who knows how long. so def no art supplies or books for me.and yes, what if I stay? what if I don't? I hear you!!!
ReplyDeletejust 10yrs ago i wouldn't have minded, but now, sheesh, totally disorientating.
Deletewe're off to uk for 5months. long enough to need more than holiday stuff, not long enough for everything!
Yes, me too, we're on the brink of putting our house on the market and a million what-ifs flood my mind, I'm sighing, sipping tea, and breathing.......x
ReplyDeleteyes, i hide in tea too. lol found some lovely organic green teas.
Deletemmmm waiting for answers it seems.
ReplyDeletefinding the peace and quiet in a limbo can be challenging.
i just went through my book collection (of the books that are here, there are also a huge bunch in sweden...) which felt good. to get rid of things i probably would not read again. or to pass them onwards...
by the way,
have you hear of book crossing?
oh...i understand this so well. i don't envy you the unknowing of how-long-maybe-always...that really muddles things even more!
ReplyDeletehow do we truly define what is needed...as opposed to wanted...and who's to say wanting something doesn't have value as well?
this is what i'm turning over and over in my head and heart...and we're only going a half hour or so from here....lol. seems to me there's a huge opportunity here for me, though so i'm trying to sink into it -- which has required vast amounts of tea and a great deal of walking away and coming back. ;)
xoxo
Preparing to move is the worst. However, I disposed of so many things I held onto for years just because I didn't feel like packing them (they weren't very important anyway). Moving's a good way to figure out what you want, need. Good luck! And I hope the house sells soon!
ReplyDeleteour dilemma is that we're not moving! lol we're just going to uk for 5 months. we might sell the house, we might not, we'll likely return, possibility we might not..... eek
Delete"Nothing is more important than an unread library" John Waters
ReplyDeleteI have piles of books everywhere that are waiting to be read. some i will end up reading and some i will not. i just accept it now
Being an expat i know how hard it is not to know what is next. i just try to go with the flow and if we have to move then we will
I have given away so many books before moves and I always miss some of them! Moving is so hard...I like to hide in books too. How did you like Great House?
ReplyDelete5 stars!
Deletehiding in a book is the best. Hope things sort themselves out - seems like you have a lot of thoughts to think.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness do I feel you!!! The good that comes out of the uncertain in-between, for me, was an enormous practice in my endless learning to let go. If there is anything I could have done better though based on what I just experienced, it's this: I should have kept better inventory of what I left behind, AND, I should have gotten rid of more. I didn't need nearly what I thought I needed, so much could be replaced!! The best way I can describe it is If I opened a box that held preciousness and something meaningful, it was like opening treasure. The rest left me scratching my head like --what the heck was I thinking? Hope you find some sleep soon!!! Lack of only makes things worse doesn't it...thinking of you and brewing tea on your behalf :).
ReplyDeletexo
fortunately i have decluttered over the years. my new-found tendency to ket go means i seem to be floating and scattered! lol
Deletetoo many variables,too many what-ifs. trying to find a middle place.
What makes things like this hard for me, is having to make the decisions, while life is still going on ie lack of sleep, sick babies, dinner prep. Objects and their needs, life and it's needs, sigh. Is it the fear of a "wrong" choice, even though I know my heart will guide me, it is hard for me to trust it sometimes when push comes to shove. I feel as though, it will only be "right" if I analyze till it bleeds to death. Maybe ultimately we know what do do, we just have to be ok doing it. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to look at how "what-if" Sending you wishes of peace of mind xo
ReplyDeleteBeautiful here, Monica. And those are difficult questions.
ReplyDeletewelcome liza!
Deletethe hardest would be deciding which books stay, which books need to come with.
ReplyDeletei hope sleep comes your way tonight :)
thank you. got some last night.
DeleteSo many what if questions, I know the feeling. Hiding in a good book is the perfect relief.
ReplyDeleteSo many unknowns, that must be hard. I don't deal well with unknowns! Go with the flow and if it all gets too stressful, put the kettle on and resort to "tea therapy"! xx
ReplyDeletethere's just too many of them, and the life includes a small one who dislikes change. yes, tea therapy, always. ;)
DeleteI felt you here...loud and clear
ReplyDeleteone step
one day
one moment
all equal
one amazing adventure!
love and light
This is lovely & very peotic. You capture the everyday thoughts & worries so well. Sometimes I find my thoughts flash by like flipping through channels on TV. A book is a great solution. Helps to quiet the mind & let you relax.
ReplyDeleteHope this message finds you well,
e
these are significant questions. right now we are in the process of beginning a move. we don't know exactly where we move to or when, but we begin and so have similar questions to answer. i want to say, i need less and less, but today as i washed 20 plus rolling pins for a tag sale (yes, i had a collector's problem) i wanted to keep more than the one i need. i wanted three of them. why? i don't know yet. and this is just the proverbial tip. there is a house and history to contend with. what to keep of that?
ReplyDeleteless and less, i hope my answer is honestly.
xo
erin
i love it when you share your senses. it zaps me to the present.
ReplyDelete